Level of Seriousness
After a short conversation with my Hunney...I came to a tough realization. Of course I know that life has changed since Nanny passed away back in December, I guess I just didnt fully realize how much of my life it affected.
In any relationship before this one...having a man meet my parents was of course a good step in the level of seriousness for me...but the be all and end all was meeting Nanny and Grandpa. I remember when Kirt and I were on our way to Lapasse for the first time together. I honestly think I was more nervous than him. Both Nanny and Grandpa were such good judge of character and both knew me so well and always knew what was good for me, whether I believed it at the time or not. :)
All of this came about because Hunney thinks meeting Mom is too soon right now. Its been a month since we met, and I guess started dating. It was obvious after the first date (that was almost 24 hours long) that we wanted to be with each other. :) :) :) He wouldnt actually be meeting Mom until the end of April at a charity function, but I needed to ask him now in order to get a ticket for him. I dont want to put a huge amount of pressure on him as that is not fair! I do think that if things continue going as well as they have been in the last month, three months would be rather appropriate.
Of course I love my Mom, hold her in very high regard and her opinion means the world to me! I almost feel guilty for Nanny and Grandpa being the be all and end all and not her and Dad. Maybe its because Mom is so nice and sweet that I dont know if she would tell me flat out if she did or didnt get a good feeling. I know Nanny would, she was the bearer of the truth, regardless of what it was! And with Grandpa, you could just tell with what he didn't say. Strong silent type.
So now, the be all and end all is gone. Who holds that power and opinion now?
Maybe I am ready to make that decision on my own now. Of course I know what I want in a man and in a relationship both now and in the future. Took a long time to learn this part of myself, but I know now, which is a great feeling!
I really wish Nanny and Grandpa could have sat in the front row of a church to watch me get married. I also wish that they could have lived to see their great grandchildren. More than anything. I know in a way they will see all of these great things that I hope are in my future, including graduation and having an exciting career in education. They wanted me to be happy, and in way I feel like they had so much faith in me and believed that I will.
I find it truly amazing that even my dating life has now changed. I guess now I just have to be confident in the values that they taught me in the last 25 years...
- never settle
- follow my dreams
- trust my intuition
- be self sufficent
- love with all of my heart
- never go to bed angry
Life certainly has changed and its amazing how much I miss Nanny and Grandpa. Pivitol people in my life are now gaurdian angels. I am truly blessed.
~A~
After a short conversation with my Hunney...I came to a tough realization. Of course I know that life has changed since Nanny passed away back in December, I guess I just didnt fully realize how much of my life it affected.
In any relationship before this one...having a man meet my parents was of course a good step in the level of seriousness for me...but the be all and end all was meeting Nanny and Grandpa. I remember when Kirt and I were on our way to Lapasse for the first time together. I honestly think I was more nervous than him. Both Nanny and Grandpa were such good judge of character and both knew me so well and always knew what was good for me, whether I believed it at the time or not. :)
All of this came about because Hunney thinks meeting Mom is too soon right now. Its been a month since we met, and I guess started dating. It was obvious after the first date (that was almost 24 hours long) that we wanted to be with each other. :) :) :) He wouldnt actually be meeting Mom until the end of April at a charity function, but I needed to ask him now in order to get a ticket for him. I dont want to put a huge amount of pressure on him as that is not fair! I do think that if things continue going as well as they have been in the last month, three months would be rather appropriate.
Of course I love my Mom, hold her in very high regard and her opinion means the world to me! I almost feel guilty for Nanny and Grandpa being the be all and end all and not her and Dad. Maybe its because Mom is so nice and sweet that I dont know if she would tell me flat out if she did or didnt get a good feeling. I know Nanny would, she was the bearer of the truth, regardless of what it was! And with Grandpa, you could just tell with what he didn't say. Strong silent type.
So now, the be all and end all is gone. Who holds that power and opinion now?
Maybe I am ready to make that decision on my own now. Of course I know what I want in a man and in a relationship both now and in the future. Took a long time to learn this part of myself, but I know now, which is a great feeling!
I really wish Nanny and Grandpa could have sat in the front row of a church to watch me get married. I also wish that they could have lived to see their great grandchildren. More than anything. I know in a way they will see all of these great things that I hope are in my future, including graduation and having an exciting career in education. They wanted me to be happy, and in way I feel like they had so much faith in me and believed that I will.
I find it truly amazing that even my dating life has now changed. I guess now I just have to be confident in the values that they taught me in the last 25 years...
- never settle
- follow my dreams
- trust my intuition
- be self sufficent
- love with all of my heart
- never go to bed angry
Life certainly has changed and its amazing how much I miss Nanny and Grandpa. Pivitol people in my life are now gaurdian angels. I am truly blessed.
~A~
posted by Amanda | 8:31 AM
2 Comments:
It truly is sad that you don't have your grandparents to help you make these decisions anymore. But hey, when have I ever been wrong in my judgements on your men?? You can always count on me to tell you who the losers are. I should know, we can smell our own!!
Thanks Jer! And you know what, you are right! Between you and Ben, I have two wonderful acting-brothers! Awesome! I totall aprecaite it! You are the bestest!
*hugs*
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